people with an atrium in their house arent allowed to complain about anything or i’ll fucking attack them
if your house is ever this sexy i’ll fucking kill you
this is the cure to depression. if my house was that sexy my mental illness would go away
honestly yea
(via heart)
Society debating whose fault it is that kids aren’t taught necessary life skills anymore (2016)
(via beyoncescock)
Naming my first kid “The Ocean” so that I stick my ear up to my wife’s stomach and say that I can hear the ocean
(via alarmingpenguin)
me: pets my dog so gingerly and sweetly as to not hurt his delicate puppy bones
my dog: headbutts me in the ass so hard i go flying forward three feet and smashes my head against the hardwood
(Source: pizzaback, via the-girl-in-chains)
That was just pure disrespect, she deserves the money, it was accumulated in her presence, with her support, can we please use respectful language when we speak about women please
(via the-girl-in-chains)
every other youtuber: *channel inevitably dies due to scandal*
jenna marbles: “we found out that my dog has a soap fetish, so here’s him reviewing different soap brands + we made him bed out of soap bars”
(via heart)
(Source: pinkgoodra, via alarmingpenguin)
this is the timeline that we live in
iconic
you don’t have to know anything about Star Wars, but PLEASE watch this.
(Source: fleetwoodbrak, via urbandictoinary)
my dumb cat got arrested
he and a couple other neighborhood cats were caught fighting a couple nights ago and someone picked them up and took them to the shelter, it doesn’t open until 11 so i can’t go get him yet
😑 costs 15 dollars to get a pet out of the shelter even though they’ve already inconvenienced me enough by kidnapping my son
snndjfdjcnjdkxm….
Other Fans: haha Peter B. is Miles’s weird uncle!
Me, knowing what always happens to Spider-Man’s uncle in every universe:
(via amandrew-kirkpatrick)
